The meaning of security

Security. What does it mean really? In these days people seldom find it. Oh, they may think they have it if they are financially well off. Secure in their place in the world. Some of us have security in our faith. Secure in our health. Wealth. Family life. But some of us have issues with security. We have anxiety problems. Sometimes we wake up in the middle of the night afraid for no apparent reason. I know I do. I know there is nothing to fear. Everything is alright with my world. I know there are things in this world that are bad, but I have no control over them. I can only pray for all involved and concentrate on my own life. What is security to me? The little green glow on my ceiling in my bedroom. I can turn over and see that and know that I am not far from help if I need it. That green glow is my cell phone charged and ready for me to use. A weird reason to be secure, Uh?

Going into Battle with ...

I have two of nephews living with me (who I refer to as my boys). One is Cory AKA SMC (snickering male child),, and the other is Patrick, my army veteran. The other day I was minding my on business in my studio when I heard a high pitched scream of terror and a crash coming from the Dark Zone (the other end of the house where they reside.). Normally I would not venture into the Dark Zone except to talk briefly with them or to get them up and only if I take a big stick with me in case something reaches out of the darkness to grab me. However, concern for Patrick (as Cory was out of town at the time) sent me sprinting into the blackness. Flinging open his door expecting God only knows what that would make an ex soldier scream like a little girl I saw something that shocked me.

Patrick was backed against the wall, shit kicker boots on, hands encased in heavy work gloves, a rolled up magazine in one hand and a blow torch in the other, wild eyed and breathing hard.

Okay, wth?

"It's in here! I'm going to kill that f*****. It's out to get me!"

Apparently, this crawled out of his closest...



Did I mention that Patrick is terrified of spiders?

"Okay, Patrick. Please, don't burn the house down." I calmly closed the door and retreated from the Dark Zone, before the eight legged freak came looking for me. I hate them, too.

Christmas Memories-Part 2

This happened when I was about eight/nine and we were living in a dinky mobile home park in Florance, SC. I guess things were lean that year because there was not much under the tree that I can remember. But on Christmas eve we all got a great surprise. A knock came on our door that night with a merry ho, ho, ho. OMG, It was Santa! At our door! With a big bag of toys! He came in and gave out presents all around. I can't remember what they were, just that we had a personal visit from old St. Nick.
Years later and really to this day we have no idea who it really was, but I have a suspicion that it was a dentist that work with my dad's dental lab.

Any special memory you have of Santa?

Christmas Memories-Part 1

I thought that since Christmas is only a week away that would share some past Christmas memories of mine this week.
I think my earliest memory was when I was five or six years old and was in my hometown of North Wilkesboro, NC. We were in the parking lot of a grocery store (probably a Piggy Wiggly) in my grandmother's Chevrolet surrounded by all the shiny decorations that were so popular in the sixties.. I remember looking up and seeing a light going by in the sky. Being just three I just knew it was Santa and that he was going to my mammaw's house and that he would leave without delivering presents because we were not there. That upset me bad.
Of course, it was a plane, but my youthful, Innocent self did not know that. My grandma explained to me that Santa would come back because it was still early and he had to go to other kids houses, too.
What did I get that year. The only present I remember I got (though I'm sure there were more) was a red cowgirl outfit complete with hat and boots (my favorite song that year was These Boots Are Made For Walking by Nancy Sinatra) and a pony. Yes, I really did get a pony. I named him Silver after the Lone Ranger's horse even though he was brown.

How about you? What is your earliest Christmas memory?

Sunset Beauty

Lost Pictures

Some people are claiming he made this up. Others think it's a great find. I think he really did find these pictures. I hope he can find the owners. These are great photos. Very professional looking.

My Snow Day

So, my day started off good. It had snowed over night. A beautiful, glittering snow.I mean, it really glittered. Beautiful in the porch light. I got up to go to work. It was easy to remove the snow from my car. My car started up just fine (which surprised me.). The roads looked really clear. So I started off. I made it to the top on the hill just 100 yards from my house and started to slide. And there was no stopping it until I was in a ditch. There went my morning. So I called work and was told that all the roads were bad. They looked clear, but apparently were covered in a thin layer of black ice.
So I walked back home. Where my boss called me to asked if I could find a way in. Yeah, be right there. Not. I live in the country surrounded by farmers. Wasn't going to bang on my neighbors doors at six in the morning to ask them to take me to work.
Boss called back to say forget it. Which I already had.
Then came the round of calls to wrecker services. I guess they all saw an opportunity to make some extra money off us. Every one I called wanted $60-$75 to pull my car out. Even the one I use when I have car problems wanted $65. What the *****. They only charged me $40 last time I had them tow my car.
I called my mechanic to ask if he knew someone that would like to make some cash. He didn't and he was too busy to come out. *sigh*
Called work to see if anyone there could pull me out after work. One of my co-workers said he had to go home and get his chains but that he would come out after work. Yay! We take care of each other there.
Later that day he called to say he couldn't find his chain. Started to feel as if I would have to call a wrecker. I was getting so not happy.
Then a miracle. My next door neighbor, a young hefty guy, along with a youngster from down the street, another young strong boy, knocked on my door. I was told to get my nephew coated up and the three of them would get the car out. I was dubious as I followed them down to where my poor car sat back end in the ditch. The snow was almost gone at this point. The younger guy got in and, with the other two pushing, gunned it and the car was in the street. I did a happy dance. I'm sure that entertained them. They also refused money for helping me and I know they both could use it.
I now know my car is front wheel drive. That's good to know.
So, I'll try this again in the morning. I can't afford to miss another day.

Oh, yes. My boss posted on Facebook that she was taking a snow day off tomorrow. Urgh! That means more work for me.

Guerrilla Holiday

Randon acts of kindness. Click on the pic to find the blog I got it from. I've got a few ideas of what I want to do. This should be fun.

Inspiration Avenue Weekly Challenge-Metamorphosis

What am I becoming? A rose in bloom? A bird in flight? A star shining bright? A fire burning my soul, my spirit, my life.

This is what I came up with for Inspiration Avenue's challenge this week for Metamorphosis.

I have been seeing changes in my own life lately and have been wondering where they are taking me.

I chose four of favorite themes for this-fire, roses, birds, and stars.

Changes

Have you ever wanted to just throw you most precious things in your car, sell everything else, and run away? Start over anew somewhere else?

I have. More and more everyday. Looking over my life I have realized that there is really nothing keeping me here. Except maybe the economy. I don't have any close friends here. Never had time to make any. I have many accaintainces, but no one to really miss me. My sisters are here, but they have their own lives and they rarely call me much less spend time with me. I have Cory here, but he said he might move in with his mom if she found a place away from her boyfriend or go live with his younger brother when he goes off to college.

As for this house. My name is not on the contract. Dad and Mom's is and they are both dead. I was recently told that the mortgage company can sell it out from under me after I made many payments on it. And they are ****** enough to just do that if I am late on a payment. Also, this neighborhood is going downhill. The guy that owns the houses around me is just renting to anyone. I am so tired of seeing the cops out here alot. Even as I write this the constable is next door banging on the door. I also don't like being this far out in the boonies. I want to be in town.

I found a nice apartment complex in town I might check out if I decide to stay here. Cory could stay with me then. And they accept pets. And have a pool, basketball court, party hall, and gym. I am so tempted to move. Did I also mention that in the winter I won't be freaking out about having to try to get home from work in the snow because the roads will be cleared.

More debating will be needed here. Comments?

The Gift

I came home from work yesterday and was met by Barney at the door. He gave me a sweet meow while looking up at me with those loving, adoring eyes. I went to step in and just barely avoided stepping on a dead mouse.

Now, I know all of you out there had the same reaction at this as my friends here..."oh, how sweet. He bought you a gift to show you how much he loves you."

Yeah, right. I think he just want the entertainment of watching mom shriek and do the EwwwDance. I swear I heard the sound of kitty laughter as he ran off.

Needless to say the removal of dead mouse fell to snickering male child while I left to go to Micky Ds for a latte to calm my nerves.

Natural Timeless

I just wanted to repost this entry because I have been wondering about the direction of my life and been going over this book again.

I have been introduced to this book called Style Statement by Carrie McCarthy and Danielle LaPorte by inkonmyfingers.typepad.com and decided to get it. It suppose to help the reader find their life style, their style statement that relates to all parts of their life. So I read it and did the exercises inside.


Let me tell you now, this book is not for the faint of heart. It forces the reader to really examine themselves. While doing the exercises I have discovered a few things about myself that truly stunned me. I mean, I did not know some of that about me (or I did know and was just denying it).
After I was done I found that I was a…..


Natural Timeless!


Quoted from the book-


Spirit: Natural is genuine, free from artificiality, affectation, and inhibitions. Natural is known for being spontaneous and easygoing. Natural hates to be fenced in and riles against conformity and unreasonable rules., though they are rooted in moral certainty and a strong sense of justice. Very much at ease with their essential selves, Natural is often very instinctive, sensuous, or highly sexual. They are not strangers to hedonism or pleasure seeking. They love to get down to basics and can be graceful and direct communicators. Down to earth, literally and figuratively, Natural has a deep reverence and respect for nature and ecological systems, which delight and replenishes them, and an appreciation of supernatural forces.


Look and feel: All things generated by nature: wood, minerals, gems. Natural coloring, textiles, and produce. Rustic, primitive, flowing, native, or common to it’s surroundings.

How does the commercial song go-"the look, the feel of cotton..."


Definition of timeless from dictionary.com


Without beginning or end, eternal, everlasting, referring to or restricted to no particular time, enduring, abiding, permanent


This is so me! Now I understand my collection of stones (and here everyone thought I was a secret pagan), my dislike of trends, my love of ruins and abandon farmhouses, my need to get away to a spot in nature, my need of space.

You can find out more about all this by visiting stylestatement.com

An Unusual Wake Up Alarm

Crash! Bang!

I jumped up from a dead sleep, ready to yell at the furry boys for breaking something and waking me up. But upon touring the kitchen and living room I couldn't find anything broke. They were actually asleep.

Then I heard shouting and banging outside. I looked out my back window to see what my neighbor was up to.

And got an eyeful.

There was my neighbor in the yard on his stomach in handcuffs while men in black milled around. Inside the house were men in fatiques and black masks carrying guns throwing cushions around and upturning furniture. At that time a man walked underneath MY window and I could see S.W.A.T. on the back of his shirt. He looked up at me and I decided not to investigate further. I don't need that trouble.

I was almost afraid to leave the house to go to my car to go to work. Does the man who owns that house ever check the background of the people he rents to? That's like the second time the police did a bust there. Last year they caught renters there dealing. Those people had about twelve pitbulls! They actually told me that those dogs were so tame I could go pet them whenever I wanted. Like...NO.

I have nothing against pitbulls. My other neighbors has one and she's a sweetheart. I pet her all the time. But not twelve of them. No.

Anyway, that was my morning.

I Was Such a Bad Girl

I was downdown again today, on the alley, passing Starbucks with the windows down in the heat. That fappee kept calling to me and when that unique smell of coffee hit as I passed I caved. (Go ahead. slap my hand. I deserve it. The Devil made me do it.)

Easter Morning

I awoken this morning to silence. Both nephews and the cats were all still asleep. The neighbors were probably still sleeping off last night's party run. I was just warm enough to be drowsy. I had no place to go and not really anything to do for a change so I just laid there, reluctant to get up. I wanted to enjoy the quiet.

Then, into that silence, came one sound. One pure note of bird song. I'm not quit sure what bird, but it was a beautiful sound. A song of joy, of life, in celebration of a new morning, a promise of a sunny warm day. As I laid there listening to it's song I realized that today was Easter.

I thought of Easters past. The fun of my childhood on this day. Of me and my siplings finding Easter baskets waiting for us full of candy and toys. Of egg hunts, church services, and family dinners. It was only as an adult that I think back and wonder at my mother finding a way to get us those baskets because there was never really alot of money back then. Our holiday dinners were never big elaborate deals. And I can remember only once getting a new Easter dress thanks to my grandparents. I never understood the need for new clothes to wear to Easter services.

I think that the best thing I remembered about Easter was coloring eggs, of finding new unique colors combinations. Of playing with the dyes and making a really big mess in the kitchen. As my nephews grew up and I began helping them color eggs they of course got new things to play with -glitter, stickers, crayons, pens. I had a blast with them resulting in a mess in my kitchen. And I enjoyed hiding the eggs and watching them run around the yard trying to find them. I added the encouragement of attaching money value to each egg. But nothing made me smile the most then seeing their eyes light up when they got up and saw those brightly colored and stuffed baskets waiting for them. Me and my sister never bought premade baskets. We always bought the things empty and fixed them ourselves, individualizing each one according to the boy.

Of course we made sure the boys knew that Easter was not all about baskets and eggs and bunnies. That Easter was about Christ and His sacrifice for us. All of my boys are good born again Christens. They have their moments when I want to slap them on the back of the head sometimes, but for the most part they are good boys.

I asked Cory if he wanted an Easter basket. He rolled his eyes at me, but did admit that he would like a chocolate bunny. I guess I'll try to find one tomorrow on clearance.

I hope all of you have a Happy Easter and a great week to come.

Loves, Kelly

Goundhog Day

I sure hope that the groundhog does not see his shadow. I want winter to be over!

Today is also Imbolc. I'm not a Wiccan myself, but I always celebrate Imbolc since being introduced to it by a few Wiccan friends. Maybe because I love candles. Maybe because I need a visual symbol to know that winter won't last much longer. I know many of you grow tired of hearing how much I hate winter, but since I suffer from arthritis the cold just keeps me in pain. I long for warmer days and less pain.

The First Happy Monday

I want to start out the year thinking good thoughts, so I am starting a new weekly post. On Mondays, to start out the week right, I will blog about something that makes me happy. This first Monday of 2010 I want to blog about books. In particularly art books.
I love getting a new book showcasing the artwork of others, especially mixed media arts. When I need inspiration they are always there for me to look through for ideas. Every artist should have at least a book on design and composition, as well as books in mediums that one does not use. Inspiration can be found there, too. Even though I am a painter and a mixed media artist, I find inspiration in pottery, papermaking, and printing.
My newest book was delivered on Christmas Eve from Amazon. It’s sort of a birthday present for myself. It is Creative Paint Workshop for Mixed Media Artists by Ann Baldwin. I love it. I have already gotten ideas from it. She’s a great artist.
So, going to go use some of those ideas now.
Later

First Snow and An Harrowing Trip Home

Love the snow but wish I wasn't out in it Friday night. When I went in to buy supplies it was raining. When I came back out the parking lot was covered. Thus began My harrowing trip home. What is normally a 20 minute drive began 3 hours long. There were cars all over the road, in ditches, and stopped on hills they could not get up. I managed to get within 5 miles of my house and hit a hill I could not get up. I finally slid into the ditch while trying to get up it.

Luckily a nice man and his son came by and got my car out of the ditch. And while we were doing that a young lady in an SUV came by and offered me a ride home. With my grocies. And of course, the lights kept going off and on. I shouldn't complain. Some people still don't have power.

My neighbor helped me go get my car out of the ditch yesterday, so all's good. I did not like my car on the side of the road.

An Insight

Today I learn something about myself. I have never been a patient person. I hate to wait on anything, but today on my way home I decided I needed something really bad. An end of the work week perk. So I sat in my car-texting, writing, going over my calender, inching forward only a few feet at a time when I happen to glance at my car clock. I was only two cars away from my prize and realized I have been in line for twenty minutes! That must be a record for me. As I reached the window and forked over my hard earned money I admitted to myself.
I am a hardcore Starbucks fanatic. Especially when a Venti Pumkin Spice Latte with a double shot of epresso was waiting for me. Yummm, Heaven!

An Answer, At Last!

So, this week I have been to the ER twice and had the EMTs out to the house three times over Mom's bleeding. She keeps breaking open and bleeding badly from her arm shunt. Of course, the good doctors could not tell us why or what to do to stop it. I was told to just keep a bandage on her arm, get up at all hours of the night to check it, and hope for the best.

WT.......?

That's our medical system for you. I bet if she had the name of one of the uppity families around here she would not of been sent home with a "oh, well".

So I went home, took all her meds and vitamins and went online. After an exhausted search I finally found the culprit.

Aleve.

That's right. Plain old aleve, or napoxen. The side effects are prolong bleeding, bruising, abdominal pain, diffeculty breathing, plus some more, but these were what Mom was dealing with. So I took her off the aleve (myself, too). Then I looked up Tylenol. It was not much better. So no painkillers for either of us. I just hope this takes care of this problem. If not I will have to cancel my vacation plans and I really don't want to.

I guess she and I will have to learn to like pain. Maybe we can get jobs at Madame M's House of Pain.hehe